The Body Building Brainf*rt

If you are, or know someone who is, a body builder, this little poem will make you laugh (and think twice before reaching for the steroids.) Cheers to you, Muscles…

Body building funny poem

Were you just a skinny w*nker after whom no-one would hanker?


Pumpy, pumpy, pumpy pump
Body building’s such a hump
Grow your muscles giant size
Let your ego aggrandise. [Continue reading]

Small business: “We don’t have to be on page 1 of Google? Are you nuts?”

There’s nothing like a digital bombshell to make someone choke on their Skinny Latte. But choke the lovely Howard did, when I said he was nuts to try to get on to Page 1 of Google.

“What the f*** do you mean? We’ve just spent thousands on a fancy new humdingering all-singing fully optimized website and SEO consultancy and you’re telling me it’s not necessary?”

htwb-google-2016Poor Howard’s eyes were bulging by now, but of course wasted money to him is about as welcome as a t*rd in an ice bucket. He is an accountant. [Continue reading]

Help! How do I train staff to write better local government reports?


Hi Suze: Do you have any tips for writing 'interesting' reports for committees in a local government environment? I am doing some internal training in my local government department and am looking for ideas for exercises for our staff, which go … [Continue reading]

Good Thanksgiving feast, was it? If not, read on…


A rather rude poem for Holiday "chefs" in the USA who, post-Thanksgiving, are now all cooked out. Bon appétit, if you can face it... THANKSGIVING AFTERMATH Thanksgiving is over The turkey is done Dismembered, digested And perfectly … [Continue reading]

How to write a better business plan: 10 Quick Tips


There comes a time when most people starting or developing a business, even a small one, need to write a business plan to secure funding, to establish credibility with stakeholders, to guide the business along its journey, and more. My own … [Continue reading]

Content writing: never forget to proof-reed the Big Stuff


Inspired as I was by a Facebook conversation with my good friend and colleague Mark Orr, I want to share something with you about business writing that's so basic even your Golden Retriever probably should know about it. But yet, it escapes nearly … [Continue reading]