Want to improve your grammar, spelling, punctuation and syntax while groovin’ around your office or living room? Here’s how – and I dare you not to start bopping in your seat while you learn these basic writing rules…
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It’s amazing to think that it’s 6 years since I wrote this eBook and despite the fact that only a few thousand of you (well, quite a few thousand) have bought a copy, many of my lovely readers are still getting sh*t like this soooo wrong.
Common grammar mistakes: why do we still make them?
In a word – well, a few words – it’s because the English language has mental health issues. Ergo, it’s nuts. There are so many exceptions to rules in English that it’s hardly worth studying the actual rules.
All the same, for those mere 1.5 billion people who speak English as a first or other language, we need to get the basics right as far as is humanly possible. Here, now, are some excerpts from my earlier writings, distilled down into the main areas where we still screw up… [Read more…]
You can’t say we don’t celebrate romance here on #HTWB … even the Grammar Police have, er, something to say about Valentine’s Day. If you want an alternative to the schmaltzy goo that permeates February 14th, you’re in the right place. Enjoy.
VALENTINE’S DAY WITH THE GRAMMAR POLICE
Roses are red, violets are blue
That’s just a cliché. Don’t like it? Go scr*w.
Violets is blue, roses is red,
Get noun/verbs together, you puerile d*ckhead.
And roses are red while violets are blue
Don’t start with conjunctions, they’re strictly taboo. [Read more…]
A quick glance at the UK’s Daily Fail – especially on weekends when they leave the cleaners to write the stories – shows you just how ridiculous you look when you get the noun-verb relationships and other syntax wrong.
Do you ever do this? Of course not…but just in case you might miss the odd goof, the following will ensure that you never make a tw*t of yourself as these Daily Fail writers do…
The latest grammar goofs from one of the UK’s most “popular” newspapers
Bling: Kim posted this image of the £3.5m ring that was stolen on Instagram before the robbery. I thought the ring was stolen during the robbery? [Read more…]
These grammar “rules” have been around on the internet for a while now and I don’t think anyone knows who thought them up originally. However if it was you, please let me know and I’ll give you an appropriate credit!
In the meantime, enjoy and share….
1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction. [Read more…]