Good Thanksgiving feast, was it? If not, read on…

A rather rude poem for Holiday “chefs” in the USA who, post-Thanksgiving, are now all cooked out. Bon appétit, if you can face it…

Funny rude poem about Thanksgiving by Suzan St Maur


Thanksgiving is over
The turkey is done
Dismembered, digested
And perfectly spun…

…into many waste products
Down sewers and sinks
In unmentionable forms
With unmentionable stinks. [Read more…]

Have you read your Huff Post today?

It’s ever-more amazing what you read in the Huffington Post … a glorious nirvana for us bloggers and a promotional value of $$$s/£££s to say we’ve been published there.

Have you read your Huff Post today?

Love the hair, Arianna.

But wait. Could it be that this pinnacle of journalistic excellence is starting to doff its cap to a weensie bit of sensationalism now and then?

Here’s a little anthem to celebrate its emerging descent from intellectual superciliousness… [Read more…]

Why “conversate” makes me expectorate…

You gorgeous Americans delight in creating new words in the English language and much as I love most, the verb “conversate” is not one of them. So strongly does this word make me want to spit (or to be pretentious, “expectorate”) that I have written a short poem about it… Enjoy.

Why "conversate" makes me expectorate...

Why converse, when conversate says just the same, but longer?

Altogether, now: time to spew…

Let’s conversate

Conversation is an art
That brainy people follow
But brainy types need far more hypes [Read more…]

Funny Poems on How To Write Better – Orange Shoes

Orange Shoes

HTWB brogues

This awful orange locomotion…

Such nice young men who seem to choose
Alluring jackets, suits and trews
But feet just shod in shocking shoes
Bright orange brogues, no matter whose.

In this good year, twenty sixteen
It’s hard to know why they’re so keen
To shock the eyes of all who’ve seen
Bright orange brogues, so painfully clean.

Suited now in browns or blues
With shirts and ties a Lord would choose
Matched with belts (and a few tattoos)
They mess it all up with those orange shoes.

[Read more…]

Poets Corner: swearing in the 21st century

HTWB swear jarMuch as we focus hard on business writing here on HTWB I am encouraging us all to think poetically, partly of course because currently I am writing a book of incredibly disgusting verse.

This is to amuse us all over the winter Holidays and other occasions when conventional prudery tends to take a back seat.

But actually my poems aren’t that filthy. Honest. And here’s an example to set us in a good mood for the weekend… [Read more…]

The Nativity with a modern twist…

Welcome back to roller banner supremo and performance poet extraordinaire Steve Crawford, who has penned his own version of the Nativity story for us in verse…enjoy!

The Nativity with a modern twist

“Nowadays a call to social services, means they would take that baby away.”

On Christmas night apparently, baby Jesus had been put in a manger.

There were horses and cows and some sheep there too, sounds to me like he could be in danger. [Read more…]