Why FRESH is such a lovely word…

Do you have a favourite word? One that sounds as good as it means? Here’s one you might like to ponder – in verse, of course…on #HTWB

MIschieverse funny poems on HTWB

Fresh is the nip of hunger when you gaze at fruit and veg before you…

FRESH

Isn’t “fresh” a lovely word?
Invigorates your faith in life
Spices up those sounds unheard
Chases out the cobwebs rife. [Read more…]

Alternative facts: it’s official. Bullsh*t is beautiful.

Now that we’re free to say we’re sharing “alternative facts” when we bullsh*t, doesn’t that just open up a fantastic new range of possibilities for us all? Here are some ideas to get you started, but please share your own alternative facts in the comments below. Welcome to this wonderful new world!

Alternative facts on HTWB

Simply lie through your teeth with bloody hard whacks, and poof! It’s fake news that you’re selling.

ALTERNATIVE FACTS

Don’t you just love these alternative facts?
Perfect solution to boring truth telling
Simply lie through your teeth with bloody hard whacks
And poof! It’s fake news that you’re selling. [Read more…]

Why yummy makes me want to vommy

Are there any words that you absolutely hate the sound of, for no proper reason? Here’s one of mine from #Mischieverse … enjoy.

HTWB tongue 2

YUMMY

There is a word that makes me cringe
And feel I want to vommy
I know I really shouldn’t whinge
But that damned word is “yummy.” [Read more…]

Guaranteed to put you off crap TV this Holidays…

If you’re planning to wrap up warm (well, maybe not if you’re in Australia) and watch crappy reality TV shows all over the Holidays, read this. You’ll be switching to Netflix in nanoseconds.

Funny poem about reality TV from Mischieverse

Yes, even in Algeria. Curried desert rats perhaps?

REALITY TV

Dontchya love reality
When it’s expressed on your TV?
Nothing like folks’ dirty clothes
And stinky socks or filthy hose…
…to make you laugh and smile and puke
And giggle, snort without rebuke
All safely shut away inside
Your television’s plastic hide.

Watch those stars eat bugs and snakes
Stuffing down what nature makes… [Read more…]

Good Thanksgiving feast, was it? If not, read on…

A rather rude poem for Holiday “chefs” in the USA who, post-Thanksgiving, are now all cooked out. Bon appétit, if you can face it…

Funny rude poem about Thanksgiving by Suzan St Maur

THANKSGIVING AFTERMATH

Thanksgiving is over
The turkey is done
Dismembered, digested
And perfectly spun…

…into many waste products
Down sewers and sinks
In unmentionable forms
With unmentionable stinks. [Read more…]

Caesar Salad. And don’t forget proper anchovies…

Whether you love or hate Caesar Salad, it’s popular enough – and ruined often enough by restaurants – to merit a slightly rude poem all about it. Bon appétit.

Funny rude poem about caesar salad by Suzan St MaurCAESAR SALAD

Caesar Salad, that’s my joy – a culinary homily
Repeated in Brit gastropubs with regular monotony
And Stateside served in volumes big enough to feed a family
But, for me, it’s an excuse for sheer and bloody gluttony.

Now, God help the commis chef who forgets about anchovies
And not those boring pseudo fresh jobs, thank you very mucho [Read more…]

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