A naughty poem about the POTUS and the FLOTUS

Enjoy some somewhat naughty verse based on observations of the USA’s Don and Mel on their recent worldwide travels …

EDIT SUNDAY JUNE 4th: As someone who lives within a short drive of the London (England) Bridge terrorist bombing atrocity last night, I just want to say how devastated I am and I hope in running this light-hearted poem it may help a little to lift the sombre mood in the UK today. Our thoughts are with the victims and their folks. xx

funny poem about the POTUS

Can you blame lovely FLOTUS ignoring his plans, when you think where his hands have been groping ya’?

POTUS AND FLOTUS

(With apologies to supporters of the current POTUS. Don’t worry, there are things to laugh about on the other team, too…)

POTUS and FLOTUS in Twenty Seventeen
A mismatch-ed couple, now that is for sure
Age, sex and customs of distance extreme
And lack of each other’s original culture.

One thing in common though, easy to spot
So simple to see why they congregated
Brain cells that simply don’t function a lot
And IQs that seem really “bigly” stagnated. [Read more…]

How to write poetically about the UK’s EU referendum

Here in the UK everyone is dying to (aren’t we?) go and vote, and decide whether the Brits stay in the European Union or leave it … so here is a simple ditty I have written for you and our lovely observers from around the world, in preparation for the monumental UK event called The Referendum.

How to write poetically about the UK's EU referendum

Just to ensure everyone with even a vague knowledge of English language culture can follow on, this oeuvre should be sung to the tune of popular children’s nursery song, Old Macdonald Had A Farm. These new words, however, are not suitable for the young or faint-hearted. [Read more…]

The real meanings of current Euro-speak

Earlier this week the BBC published a list of terminology currently being bandied around by everyone rushing to shove their opinions on Britain’s membership of the European Union down people’s throats in time for the vote on June 23rd.

How to write better Euro speak

Eurosceptic: How you’re described if you’re not sure that the EU is a good idea but are quite happy to gorge yourself on the huge salary and ample perks anyway.

I thought you might find it helpful if I added my own translations to a few of the key terms, so you know what the average UK citizen really thinks of them. Enjoy.

(And thanks for being good sports, BBC.)

Acquis communautaire: Communal access to the secret spas and swimming pools set up for Eurocrats in Brussels and Strasbourg. NB: no-one is keen on using the Brussels facility right now as it is located near Molenbeek, where the plumbing has been described as “leaky.” [Read more…]

Why you gotta love politicians

With elections due soon in the USA and the UK, to name but two, let’s be refreshed by these canny thoughts from people most of whom have been around the political block many times. Thanks to my good friend Laurence H. from London, England and Los Angeles, CA, for sharing…

Why you gotta love politicians

If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
~Jay Leno~

The problem with political jokes is they get elected. 
~Henry Cate, VII~

We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office
~Aesop~

If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn’t be any inducement to go to heaven.
~Will Rogers~

Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
~Nikita Khrushchev~

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it.
~Clarence Darrow~

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.
~Author unknown~

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
~John Quinton~

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.
~Oscar Ameringer~

I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.
~Adlai Stevenson, campaign speech, 1952~

A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
~ Tex Guinan~

I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
~Charles de Gaulle~

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
~Doug Larson~

There ought to be one day — just one — when there is open season on senators.
~Will Rogers~

What are your favourite thoughts on why you gotta love politicians?

Please share!

And should you be interested in learning more on how to express more effectively your political and other thoughts, check this out while you’re here…

 

Remembrance Day: what should we really write about it?

Remembrance Day: what should we write about it?

The poppies of Flanders Fields,
where the terrible fighting in the trenches
took place during World War One

The 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month.

For some people, the whole concept of Remembrance Day seems a bit outdated. After all, it dates back to the Armistice that was signed back in 1919.

But what does it mean to us now, in 2013? [Read more…]

css.php