DEAR PARENT – politically correct letters to parents from desperate teachers…

A hilarious selection of letters written and sent home to the parents of recalcitrant brats … as sent to me by my good friend and mentor Dhananjay (Jay) Parkhe from Bangalore, India.

Politically correct letters to parents from desperate teachers...Share these letters to inspire your favourite, long-suffering teacher friends

Dear Parent,
We are delighted to inform you that your child displays remarkable initiative. Not for him the simple-minded obedience to teachers. We refer to his admirable refusal to do homework. We have, however, humbly requested him to stoop to our level and condescend to do his homework. [Read more…]

How to write better Terms and Conditions

Getting the Terms and Conditions right is essential for all businesses, and many smaller businesses can write their own, so saving on cost and time. But just as with employment contracts and other formal documentation, getting the “Ts & Cs” wrong, and/or missing important issues, can lead to very costly mistakes. Here, expert Kerry Gibbs, legal account manager at the Northampton (UK) based BEB Consultancy, shares her advice on how to get your Terms and Conditions right…Sz.

How to write better Terms and conditions HTWBWhy are Terms and Conditions so important?

Terms and Conditions are words we hear daily. If we sign up to a gym membership, buy a car or even enter a competition we have to accept the terms and conditions before even being a party to that agreement.  So why is it that not everyone sees the real importance of having them in place when running a small business? [Read more…]

Insidious B*sterds – Writing From The Heart

For this episode of Writing From The Heart please welcome plain English poet Inappropriate Grahame, from Rugby (where the game originated), England. I had the pleasure of meeting Grahame when we were in the famous Hunt’s Bookshop in central Rugby a few weeks ago and I was hugely impressed by both him and his poems. Here is one he wrote recently, describing his thoughts about the USA today. Some strong language, but I have asterisked accordingly for our more sensitive readers…

Poem about an Englishman's view of the USA today

Inappropriate Grahame, Plain English Poet

INSIDIOUS B*STERDS

By Inappropriate Grahame

Look at those people on American TV
they’re twice the size of what humans should be.
With their storage containers, bulging with sh*te
bidding on bunkum night after night.

Pimping their rides to their diners and dives
supersize, uber sized husbands and wives
pistols protruding from four XL trousers [Read more…]

How to write a bullet-proof employment contract: 5 Top Tips

How to write better employment contracts … There’s far more to writing for business than running up emails and blog posts, as you know. Employment contracts, for example, not only have to be accurate and detailed but also must be legally correct.
Please welcome my good friend and HR expert Sue Pardy of Face2Face HR, who kindly has shared her top 5 tips on how to write employment contracts that are bullet-proof! (Please note that this applies to regulations in the United Kingdom; other countries may have different requirements.) Sz.

How to write a good employment contract

Five top tips on how to write a ‘bullet-proof’ employment contract

What is a bullet-proof employment contract? [Read more…]

COLD: Writing From The Heart

This post in our series, “Writing from the heart,” is a dark and disturbing piece that rang many bells for me about a family relationship, and made my heart go out to this talented newcomer to freelance writing from Westchester, New York, USA. Please welcome Jen Persichetti…Sz.

COLD - writing from the heart

“The person who gave me life murdered my soul.”

COLD

By Jen Persichetti

Because of you I am dead behind the eyes
Because of you I am afraid of happiness, and even hold guilt for it [Read more…]

Editing your written work: how not to miss mistakes

Today please welcome guest author Lucy Benton – originally from Illinois, USA and now resident of Sydney, Australia. Lucy is a writing and editing expert who also runs a superb blog, ProWritingPartner, which I thoroughly recommend as a goldmine of first-class grammar, editing and general writing resources. Sz.

How to edit your text properly

You ought to remove the flab as well as the excess so your reader truly understands your ideas

We are all well aware of the fact that creating something in a draft allows us to lay down the ideas and to clarify the entire structure of what we’re writing. However, the sharpness and the value of the text comes next – when you edit and refine what you want to say. [Read more…]

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