Poem for a hot summer day

I’ve lost my gin in the greenhouse

by Andrea Kingston

Please welcome Andrea Kingston, a retired GP (family doctor) who volunteers with me in our local cancer group and – it turns out – is also a talented and hilarious poet! Here is one of hers I particularly enjoyed…

I’ve lost my gin in the greenhouse
Well goodness, gracious me!
As the glass is green
It remains unseen
And I’m thirsty don’t you see?

funny poem about lost gin

“Where’s my gin? I’m still in the greenhouse.”

[Read more…]

Trying to write and sweat at the same time…

If you’re working from home and do not benefit from the rewards (hopefully healthful) of working in a fully airconditioned office building, right now during COVID-19 issues anyway … have a read. I sympathise. And right at the bottom is a suggestion to take a leaf out of our Canadians’ book…

SWEET, SWEATY SUMMER

It’s 34 degrees outside
Perfect for dear old Dubai
But western Bedfordshire’s not quite
So suited to such temps that high.

I open all my windows up
Expecting cooler air to share
Oh, “wrongeroonie” I exclaim
It’s f***ing hellish-hot out there!

funny poem about working during a heatwave with no air conditioning

As I sweat and look just ghastly, I think back to babyhood…

[Read more…]

A fumbler’s guide to live online video chats and meetings

How are you doing with your Zoom / MS Teams / Facebook Lives / Facetime and various other incarnations of live video on the internet, especially now that there are very few – if any – ways to communicate with our clients / customers, colleagues, friends and family otherwise?

The Zoom meeting … our new normal?

A while back I wrote about, and asked my learned colleagues to share their advice on, how to perform on online video as you’ll find from this incredibly comprehensive guide here. And that was before the coronavirus stopped us talking F2F.

But today, as we cope with the most recent restraints … let’s take another look at how we are communicating now. Speaking as a prime techno-fumbler myself and a beginner at this talk-and-chew-gum-at-the-same-time online video lark, I sympathise with other beginners starting out … especially as so many friends and colleagues are becoming online TV superstars…

Some tips about live online video that I’ve discovered the hard way

[Read more…]

How have we become so selfish? An 18-year-old writes about coronavirus

by James Tierney

Please welcome James Tierney, 18, a highly talented young writer who hopes to make writing his career. His current projects include excellent fiction for children and young adults: this time, however, I asked him to share his nonfiction thoughts on the coronavirus pandemic from the point of view of a teenager in the UK. Over to James…Sz.

Now can you see the benefits of being tech-savvy, as we young people are?

At first, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. It is like something you see in the movies.

Some sort of disease and no one is allowed to go out.

However, as the days have gone by the realisation has hit home. At first, they were saying it was only the elderly that were affected. As time has gone on, I have heard more cases of people around my age, or even younger, getting it and dying from it.

I think the worst of these was the 13-year-old boy who died from the coronavirus. [Read more…]

Write Around The Web: literary festival, proofreading, typography, adverbs and a smile

Welcome to our new selection of curated info from around the web — hand-picked for HTWB readers by yours truly. Enjoy!
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Milton Keynes, England — easy to get to from London, Oxford, Cambridge, Birmingham and beyond…Sz 

Milton Keynes Literary Festival 18-22 September 2019

A fabulous festival of books, words, writers and ideas that celebrates everything literary, bookish or wordyMilton KeynesAfter a triumphant debut in 2017 – with Lynton Kwesi Johnson, Michael Rosen and much more – we returned in 2018 with an even more ambitious programme, working with new Festival partners and venues to bring a cornucopia of the finest contemporary writing to the city.  Highlights in 2018 included Hollie McNish, Mark Haddon and Lemn Sissay. [Read more…]

How bad writing will cost you sales opportunities

Today we welcome sales expert Niraj Kapur, who quite rightly spits fur and feathers about the way wannabee business suppliers ruin their chances with prospects due to writing the wrong words in the wrong way. Over to Niraj…

We’ve all experienced this truly bad writing

bad sales writing

Don’t talk about yourself. Write about how you deliver benefits & help prospects.

You connect with someone interesting on LinkedIn and they sent you a terrible sales pitch.

You ask someone at a networking event to send you information and it’s full of attachments, all about them and nothing to benefit you.

You attend an exhibition and the sponsors send you an impersonal automated email within minutes of your leaving their exhibition stand. [Read more…]

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