Déjà vu jokes … plus a few more, 2019

Updated and republished July 13th, 2019: Déjà Vu for You Too? Some updated smiles for you …

Thanks to Nigel Jamie Bangs who originally shared this gag on my Facebook group, The Joke Street Journal (please join if you want some good laughs.) The original thought was this: Deja poo jokesAnd that got me thinking. So I started writing…..and writing…..and writing……and I came up with the following. Now in July 2019 I have come up with a few more. But … let’s get you thinking of even more!

Déjà Boo:  Boring people with ghost stories when it isn’t Halloween

Déjà Blue: Long-standing UK Conservative / US Democrat voter [Read more…]

So we love puns, right? Here are even more

Haunted French pancakes give me the crèpes. Here’s another handful of puns (there may be one or two duplications from earlier collections) to give us some clever smiles for this post-Independence Day, post-Canada Day weekend.

And yes: I am a newly converted Punthusiast. Here’s a Suze original to start us off:
After my car accident I called St Christopher a lying old fraud. I couldn’t have insulted a Saint Maur.
(OK, I’ll get my coat.)

more puns on HTWB

Meanwhile the latest punsations as provided, once again, by my dear friend Laurence H. from London, England:

You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish. [Read more…]

54 grammar fumblerules to make you grin

Although we’ve looked at funny grammar rules before, here is an even more comprehensive list to give you some smiles!. Enjoy (and learn, of course…)

grammar article

I wonder how much grammar rules have changed since 1558– ?

Fumblerule? Whassat, Wikipedia?

To quote the Wikipedia oracle:

fumblerule is a rule of language or linguistic style, humorously written in such a way that it breaks this rule.[1] Fumblerules are a form of self-reference.
The science editor George L. Trigg published a list of such rules in 1979.[2] The term fumblerules was coined in a list of such rules compiled by William Safire on Sunday, 4 November 1979,[3][4] in his column “On Language” in the New York Times. Safire later authored a book titled Fumblerules: A Lighthearted Guide to Grammar and Good Usage, which was reprinted in 2005 as How Not to Write: The Essential Misrules of Grammar.

I love them already–

[Read more…]

24 clever puns for out-there punsters

I’m not much of a punster myself but so many of you folks are I thought you’d enjoy these. I’ve never seen them before but they were brought to my attention by my dear friend Laurence H. from London, England, and they even made me laugh — !

puns for 2019

Let’s start off with one I just thought of … I was going to invest in a new comedy TV show, but I realised it was a Punzi scheme.

Do you punderstand the following?

1) The meaning of opaque is unclear. [Read more…]

Favourite Brexit and Trump jokes written for the long weekend

Amazingly today is yet another public holiday (May 27th 2019) amounting to at least three in the countries that I know of. ( UK: Easter, May Day and this one, plus a few as shown below. All within a few weeks of each other.)

In the UK it’s the “Spring Bank Holiday

This sort-of combines with the Christian event of Whitsun and also heralds the beginning of England’s school “half-term” holiday that includes yet another statutory Monday off, which is why schools use it in order to accept children missing four days of school when it might have been five…shame, kids. (This p*sses teachers off, too.) The actual date of the religious event of Whitsun / Pentecost is on June 9th this year but hey, never mind.

Image of Theresa May

“Brexit is (like) having a wee in the middle of the room at a house party because nobody is talking to you, and then complaining about the smell.” – Matt Abbott

“Memorial Day” in the USA This is a federal holiday in the United States for remembering and honoring people who have died while serving in the United States Armed Forces. Hats off to all you guys and gals but I’m not sure I’d want to remember your ultimate sacrifice with a BBQ. Whatever.

“Victoria Day” in Canada
We Canadians are probably the last of the British Commonwealth “Mohicans” to celebrate the birth of Britain’s Queen Victoria. Yes, we are a little slow in updating ourselves but we are working on it. Happy birthday, our Vic.

Never mind: let’s have a few laughs…Brexit first:

[Read more…]

New LinkedIn emojis: how do you like them?

As all you Linked-Inners out there will know, this noble platform has hopped yet one more step closer to Facebook with a new range of emojis to replace the simple like option. Everyone should have them by May 6th, I’m told. Here they are…

LinkedIn new emojis

An interesting selection, no? Hello? Wakey-wakey?

To think that dozens or more LinkedIn staffers will have been agonising over this selection for months! Well done folks!

Just a few questions from a picky writer

[Read more…]

css.php