Come on, China – surely you can find SOMEONE who writes English properly?

A true pearl arrived one time in the Guest Post box of a website I used to edit and for once, Suze was speechless after trying to read it. It is quite the most utter nonsense I have ever read, and trust me, I’ve read quite a lot in my time.

Checking out the source, I found that it came from a Chinese company selling children’s toys, so I’m not quite sure why they wanted the website concerned to run a guest post about an Apple iPhone. Perhaps it’s an Oriental marketing technique we haven’t heard of before in the West.

Here it is verbatim, with the link to their site removed…

on May 3, 2012, 16GB apple iPhone 4S newest arrival of shipment, The business gives the quoted price is 4600 Yuan, before comparing, pelts 250 Yuan , the digital accessoriesis: Battery charger, earphone, data line and so on. Apple iPhone 4S is one section supports the CDMA network the fashionable intelligent street machine . The apple iPhone 4S fuselage is composed of the glass and the metal, and And fuselage thickness only has 9.3 millimeters, the whole is revealing rich when Shang Gan and technical feeling. Its screen is 3.5 inch IPS touches together controls Screen, not only supports the multi-spots to touch controls the operation, but also has 640×960 The picture element superelevation resolution, cannot feel the picture element pellet nearly. In Sets 8,000,000 picture element cameras have the HDR function, the photograph strength not Vulgar. Simultaneously has also promoted theapple accessories
market development.
Apple reduction

For Heavens’ sake, Chinese businesses, if you want to be taken seriously in English-speaking countries, get someone other than a piece of hysterical article spinning software to write your marketing communications.

What would you think of a British or American business advertising in China and mangling Mandarin or crippling Cantonese in the same ridiculously awful way?

Serious help to make sure your English is perfect:

“Business Writing Made Easy”…everything you need to know about writing for business in English

“Banana Skin Words and how not to slip on them”…over 1,500 spelling and grammar tips to perfect your written English

“English to English: the A to Z of British-American translations”…more than 2,000 business and social terms from the USA, the UK, Canada, Australia and New Zealand