Funny Poems on How To Write Better – Orange Shoes

An excerpt from Mischieverse, my first book of incredibly rude and potty-mouthed poems out on Amazon pre-order now…

Orange Shoes

HTWB brogues

This awful orange locomotion…

Such nice young men who seem to choose
Alluring jackets, suits and trews
But feet just shod in shocking shoes
Bright orange brogues, no matter whose.

In this good year, twenty sixteen
It’s hard to know why they’re so keen
To shock the eyes of all who’ve seen
Bright orange brogues, so painfully clean.

Suited now in browns or blues
With shirts and ties a Lord would choose
Matched with belts (and a few tattoos)
They mess it all up with those orange shoes.

Brogues, they’re lace ups, Italian cow hide
Costing more than a private jet ride
Pinching in-grown toenails YIKES cried
Making feet feel fashionably deep-fried.

I must share just what I think
Orange brogue shoes frankly stink
Not of feet that sweat or shrink
Just because they’re out of sync.

Not sure where you got this notion
That these shoes were such high fashion
Is what you need to get in motion
This awful orange locomotion?

Orange brogues could well look swanky
In an advert from the Yankees
But remember you’ll look lanky
And, in tight shoes, will feel cranky.

Do us all a favour, please dear
Dump those orange horrors out there
Give them to a nerd with no care
For fashion. Make them disappear!


It’s the perfect gift for your friends and family who like a naughty laugh. Pre-order your copies of Mischieverse now … and tick off some of your Holiday shopping nice and early! Just click here…
Mischieverse is Suzan St Maur's first book of naughty, humorous poetry ... coming soon from Corona Books UK.

“Mischieverse: rude humour that laughs at life’s irritations”

by Suzan St Maur
to be published in September 18, 2017
by Corona Books UK
© Suzan St Maur 2017