An election song to sing to doorstep canvassers…

If you’re in the UK you could be forgiven for saying you’re sick to death of local elections, general elections, referendums, etc. etc. So here is a little ditty you can recite or sing to the next group of canvassers to land on your doorstep, preferably to a tune similar to the first verses of Ella Fitzgerald’s “A Tisket, A Tasket.” (No, I’m not THAT old.)

funny poem about elections on HTWB


Elections, elections
Some purified collections
Of bullsh*t, pure bullsh*t
You really can’t deny.

Elections, elections
Rely on our affections
For right, left or centre
Whichever sh*t you buy.

Elections, elections
Depend on folks’ connections
Working, middle, upper
Class, that’s how you fly.

Elections, elections
What to do about corrections
When most of the candidates
Are boring, dull and dry?

Elections, elections
The males have got er*ctions
Wave big whacko w*llies
And think they’ll glorify.

Elections, elections
Some women’s new directions
Show good sense, kinda tense
But have the guts to try.

Elections, elections
The parties’ new complexions
Change daily, no fail-ee
Depends on who is high.

Elections, elections
What do you tell new sections
Young voters or floaters
Who think it’s all sh*t pie?

Elections, elections
Such democratic flexions
Are all fine and dandy, but
Check real reasons why?

Elections, elections
Too many such reflections
Bore voters, remote-ers
Tired of the battle cry.

Elections, elections
Enough with disaffections
Let this be the last spree
And let’s detoxify.


With many thanks for the image to Paul Green of NN Connect Business Networking Northamptonshire.