Happy Thanksgiving, USA!

Here’s wishing you folks a wonderful Thanksgiving. (And don’t spend too much on Black Friday … remember there are more Holidays coming up!)

Happy Thanksgiving, USA!

“Thanksgiving sucks,” says turkey

Now, here is a poem for you to remind you why turkeys aren’t as fond of Thanksgiving as you are… (original author unknown)…

Why November sucks

by the turkey that got away (for a while)

When I was a young turkey, new to the coop,
My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop,
Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow,
And he told me there was something that I had to know;
His look and his tone I will always remember,
When he told me of the horrors of Black November;

“Come about August, now listen to me,
Each day you’ll get six meals instead of just three,
“And soon you’ll be thick, where once you were thin,
And you’ll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin;
“And then one morning, when you’re warm in your bed,
In’ll burst the farmer’s wife, and hack off your head;
“Then she’ll pluck out all your feathers so you’re bald ‘n pink,
And scoop out all your insides and leave ya lyin’ in the sink;
“And then comes the worst part” he said not bluffing,
“She’ll spread your cheeks and pack your rear with stuffing”.

Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat,
I sat on the stoop like a winged piece of meat,
And decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked,
I’d have to lay low and remain overlooked;
I began a new diet of nuts and granola,
High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola;
And as they ate pastries, chocolates and crepes,
I stayed in my room doing Jane Fonda tapes;
I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half,
And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed;
But ’twas I who was laughing, under my breath,
As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death;

And sure enough when November did roll around,
I was the last turkey left in the entire compound;
So now I’m a pet in the farmer’s wife’s lap;
I haven’t a worry, so I eat and I nap;
She held me today, while sewing and humming,
And smiled at me and said “Christmas is coming…”

Have a great time!

.
PS … if you’re looking for a cool, inexpensive little gift for the horse-loving folks in your life, how about one of these? Available on all the Amazons. Click on the images to go to Amazon.com…

The Horse Lover's Joke Book by Suzan St Maur

Number 1 Amazon category best seller in the UK for 14 years! And it’s an “organic” best seller, too – no Amazon sales rank manipulation…

The Pony Lover's Joke Book by Suzan St Maur

The sequel to The Horse Lover’s Joke Book – all about ponies, but the jokes are for the whole family (especially those long suffering parents…)

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