Some jokes written specially for Labor Day

A few written chuckles for Labor Day – to accompany our heartfelt wishes of luck to all of you threatened by the monster Hurricane Dorian and other storms this year.Labor Day 2019Labor Day celebrates the contribution of workers to North Americans’ economy. North Americans celebrate it by not working.

A woman came home from work and ranted about her boss. She said, “I’m never going to work for that man again!”
“Why, what did he say to you?”
“You’re fired.”

I’m going to spend Labor Day putting my liver to work.

If a train station is where the train stops, and a bus station is where the bus stops, what is a work station?

If today is Labor Day, how many babies were born?

“Labor Day is a glorious holiday because your child will be going back to school the next day. It would have been called Independence Day, but that name was already taken.” ~ Bill Dodds

Did you hear about the Labor Day joke? It doesn’t work for me.

The best way to celebrate Labor Day is by filing for unemployment.

Elevator special
In the week before Labor Day, Eli, a dirt-poor country farmer won the Lottery – half a million dollars. So to celebrate, he treated his wife and their four kids to a trip to see the Labor Day parade in New York.
He booked them rooms in the Sheraton International at the corner of Park Circle and Central Park North. They’d never been to anywhere like New York before, in fact they’d never traveled further afield than their local town, so when they got there they were completely bowled over by all the glitz, glamor and excitement of the “Big Apple”.
Eli and his son Clem were particularly mesmerized by a shiny box with silver walls in the hotel reception. They’d never before come across doors that could move apart, and then automatically close again, as neither had seen an elevator before. So they were totally amazed when a little old lady entered the shiny box and the doors closed on her. The lights on the wall by the doors flashed for a minute or so, then the doors opened and out stepped a beautiful young woman.
Eli turned to Clem and said, “Son, go get your mother.”

Can you still ‘work it’ on Labor Day?

No fear of beer
My boss made me go into the office on Labor Day. Halfway through the day, he came in to check up on me and caught me having a beer.
He said to me, “You can’t drink while you’re working.”
I said, “Oh, don’t worry – I’m not working.”

Labor or not?
I said to my son, “Do you know, most people don’t have to work today, because it’s Labor Day?”
He replied, “If people aren’t working, shouldn’t it be called “No-Labor Day?”

Labour Day

And it’s Happy Labour Day from Canada too!

I wish I made enough money from my labor to be able to afford a Labor Day vacation.

Happy Labor Day! Oh wait… we live on a horse ranch. Never mind!

The Labor Day holiday means I get my unemployment check a day late.

This Labor Day, take comfort in the knowledge that the pressure to have fun this summer is finally over.

 

With many thanks to the wonderful humor site LaffGaffe for some of these great gags! Don’t forget to visit their site – jokes for all occasions.

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