Write Around The Web: literary festival, proofreading, typography, adverbs and a smile

Welcome to our new selection of curated info from around the web — hand-picked for HTWB readers by yours truly. Enjoy!
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Milton Keynes, England — easy to get to from London, Oxford, Cambridge, Birmingham and beyond…Sz 

Milton Keynes Literary Festival 18-22 September 2019

A fabulous festival of books, words, writers and ideas that celebrates everything literary, bookish or wordyMilton KeynesAfter a triumphant debut in 2017 – with Lynton Kwesi Johnson, Michael Rosen and much more – we returned in 2018 with an even more ambitious programme, working with new Festival partners and venues to bring a cornucopia of the finest contemporary writing to the city.  Highlights in 2018 included Hollie McNish, Mark Haddon and Lemn Sissay. [Read more…]

More English language lunacy: pronunciation poem from 1922

Many thanks to my son Tom who found yet another incredible testament to the sheer lunacy of the English language, in a poem written back in 1922 by Gerard Nolst Trenité (1870-1946), a Dutch observer of English.

Poem about English language

Say inveigh, neigh, but inveigle, make the latter rhyme with eagle.

Trust a sensible, no-nonsense Dutchman to show us how ridiculous English can be…and I’m so glad to realise that it isn’t just me, but several other writers over the years, who have felt the same way.

Let me start the ball rolling here in 2018, with three areas of my home city, Milton Keynes, England:

Broughton (pronounced Brawton)
Woughton (pronounced Woofton)
Loughton (pronounced La-owton)


Gerard Nolst Trenité – The Chaos (1922)

Dearest creature in creation
Studying English pronunciation,
   I will teach you in my verse
   Sounds like corpsecorpshorse and worse. [Read more…]

How to create a roller banner that works hard for your business

How to create a rolller banner that works hard for your business

One of Steve’s own roller banners showing a workable number of words, one point of contact and a very simple call-to-action – all key points that make it powerful

Once again we welcome Milton Keynes based performance poet Steve Crawford, who recently wrote for us in verse about business jargon. When he is not composing poetry Steve works as a very talented point-of-sale creator and design genius!

One of the most popular tools in Steve’s box is the roller banner (or roll-up banner) very widely used by businesses at live events, exhibitions, conferences, training sessions and much more. In this article, Steve shares his experience and tips on how to create the right impression with – and write the right words on – on these devices so they pay for themselves in value, time after time.

A roller banner can be a valuable resource for any business looking to stand out or get noticed. However often business owners want to get as much information as possible onto a banner, and this can be counter-productive. [Read more…]

She has the perfect face for radio…

She has the perfect face for radio

The perfect face for radio…

…as my late mother, who didn’t exactly rate my talents very highly, often used to say.

However my voice on radio isn’t too bad

After having smoked cigarettes for 20 years I only quit when my son, then aged 9, shamed me into it back in 2001 (NB: by the time he was 14 he had taken it up along with all his cool buddies in secondary / high school. He still uses an e-cigarette now, aged 23. Go figure.)

Anyway now, still, my dulcet tones hang down towards the alto or even baritone and to this day I sometimes get called “Mr St Maur” by pea-brained telesales nitwits who haven’t yet figured out that “Suzan” is an exclusively female name, with perhaps the exception of an occasional drag queen. [Read more…]

Last chance to squeeze into the Referability Boot Camp in Milton Keynes tomorrow

It’s now or never. Today is your last chance to put on your reinforced thinking gear and sign up for our #Referability Boot Camp in Milton Keynes, England, tomorrow morning – July 23rd 2015.

LATEST: It was great! We had an excellent, if rather busy time but our participants left with a heavy virtual bag full of useful information to help them get more of those precious business referrals. As we’ve had a lot of interest we’re now looking at running another Boot Camp in the autumn, so drop us a comment if you want to get on the next one (and are within reach of Milton Keynes, England…) Last chance to squeeze into the Referability Boot Camp in Milton Keynes tomorrow

If you’re tough enough to cope with it, don’t miss the chance to put on your boots and kick your competition right where it hurts. Base camp is at Abbey Hill Golf Centre in MK.
[Read more…]

It’s nearly Referability Boot Camp Day in Milton Keynes…

If you’re in the Milton Keynes, England area and can spare a few hard-working hours this Thursday morning, you’ll appreciate what you learn at this butt-kicking #Referability Boot Camp at Abbey Hill Golf Centre in MK.
It's nearly Referability Boot Camp Day in Milton Keynes... [Read more…]