Diary of a social distancer – coronavirus jargon buster (sort of)

Thought you might like to share my own definititions to help us find a little bit of humour in the demon bug. Here goes:

Lockdown: move performed during the sport of Stockpiling.

Coronavirus: deadly bug related to some simple cold viruses but makes them look like pimples on an elephant’s butt by comparison. Also a combination of two words into one, which I hate. Like ‘anymore’ instead of  ‘any more.’ (Spits.)

Corona: abbreviation of the above which doesn’t refer to a brand of beer or the halo around the sun, and don’t we know it by now. Sometimes affectionately abbreviated to ‘Rona.’ (Seriously.)

Lockdown: form of head-and-arm lock popular in the new sport of Stockpiling (see below). Usually performed by one or more players on supermarket staff who try to stop them amassing more stock. [Read more…]

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