Words of wisdom for today…

small_3820575690There’s nothing like some good, old-fashioned common sense to set you up for the day. Here’s a thought-provoking list of useful points to ponder…

Life is sexually transmitted.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Men have two emotions : hungry  and horny. They can’t tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospitals, dying of nothing.

Check out more than 370 further hilarious jokes, articles and poems in our humour category, right here on HTWB

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers: what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow

Don’t worry about old age: it doesn’t last that long.

There. Feel wiser now?

What are your favorite words of wisdom?

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