Writing accidents: whatever happened to Spoonerisms?

Do you ever jumble up your words and come up with an entertaining alternative? Pity then, for poor old Reverend Spooner, whose jumbling up of words and phrases had his students at New College, Oxford rolling in the aisles laughing in the late 19th and early 20th centuries.

article about Spoonerisms

Great minds like a think (Great minds think alike)

To quote Wikikpedia:
Spoonerisms are named after the Reverend William Archibald Spooner (1844–1930), Warden of New College, Oxford, who was notoriously prone to this mistake.[3][4] The term “Spoonerism” was well established by 1921.

Approximate Spoonerisms I’ve written for some of our favourite personalities:

Jealous Boxin’ (Boris Johnson)

Trumbald Dump (Donald Trump)

Mawistful Tray (Theresa May)

Racob Mees Jog (Jacob Rees Mogg)

Carryme Jawbone (Jeremy Corbyn)

Junk-Cloud Jipper (Jean-Claude Juncker)

Toobald Dusk (Donald Tusk)

Mangeler Angular (Angela Merkel)

Beau Jivin’ (Joe Biden)

Karma Kimbumian (Kim Kardashian)

Whiney Krest (Kanye West)

Mate Kosts (Kate Moss)

Come on in, Nimble (Naomi Campbell)

Reiki Jowelling (JK Rowling)

Dikehole Mugless (Michael Douglas)

Mate Kiddietown (Kate Middleton)

Wince Premium (Prince William)

Success of Duck Eggs (Duchess of Sussex)

Wally Hillbilly (Holly Willoughby)

Yuk of Dork (Duke of York)

Jentle Killer (Kendall Jenner)

Hella Badid-ea (Bella Hadid)

Fidel No-gauge (Nigel Farage)

Now, here are some of the funniest I’ve found around the web:

Cat flap (Flat cap)

Bad salad (Sad ballad)

Soap in your hole (Hope in your soul)

Mean as custard (Keen as mustard)

Plaster man (Master plan)

Pleating and humming (Heating and plumbing)

Birthington’s washday (Washington’s Birthday)

Bottle in front of me (Frontal Lobotomy)

Sale of two titties (Tale of two cities)

Rental Deceptionist (Dental Receptionist)

Flock of bats (Block of flats)

Chewing the doors (Doing the chores)

Touch down (Dutch town)

Lashing flights (Flashing lights)

Ass greeters (Grass eaters)

And how about re-writing some well-known stories?

Prinderella and the Cince (Cinderella and the Prince)

Beeping Sleauty (Sleeping Beauty)

The Pea Little Thrigs (The Three Little Pigs)

Goldybear and the Three Locks (Goldilocks and the Three Bears)

Ali Theeva and the Forty Babs (Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves)

To round off our rumbled jilting (jumbled writing) here are a few more gems:

Fighting a liar (Lighting a fire)

You hissed my mystery lecture (You missed my history lecture)

Cattle ships and bruisers (Battle ships and cruisers)

Nosey little cook (Cosy little nook)

A blushing crow (A crushing blow)

We’ll have the hags flung out (We’ll have the flags hung out)

You’ve tasted two worms (You’ve wasted two terms)

Our shoving leopard (Our loving shepherd)

A half-warmed fish (A half-formed wish)

Know your blows (Blow your nose)

Go and shake a tower (Go and take a shower)

Tease my ears (Ease my tears)

Lack of pies (Pack of lies)

It’s roaring with pain (It’s pouring with rain)

I’m a damp stealer (I’m a stamp dealer)

Mad bunny (Bad money)

This is the pun fart (This is the fun part)

I hit my bunny phone (I hit my funny bone)

I must mend the sail ( I must send the mail)

Bat flattery (Flat battery)

Puke on (Coupon)

Belly jeans (Jelly beans)

Ready as a stock (Steady as a rock)

No tails (Toe nails)

What are your favourite Spoonerisms?

Please share them!

With many thanks for some of these Spoonerisms to Fun-with-words.com – an incredible resources of words and word games of all kinds. I could spend hours on there!
With many thanks for the image to © User:Colin / Wikimedia Commons

 

Comments

comments

Thoughts

  1. You forgot about Cinderella and her Steply Ugsisters.

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