Writing new names for poodle-cross dogs…

Writing new names for poodle cross dogs

We could probably name this a FooledYouDoodle…

Unless you have been hiding under a dog blanket for the last year or three, you won’t fail to have noticed that doggie (human) types are cross breeding everything from a Labrador to an Elephant with a Poodle, to produce a doggie pet that has the characteristics of both breeds BUT does not shed hair.

Brilliant news for families where someone is allergic to doggie hair / dandruff etc. (although the concept doesn’t always work … but that’s another story.)

However considering that most people buying these cross-bred puppies pay very substantial amounts of money for them, these folks – understandably – don’t want the word “mongrel” written on their receipt for $1,500, £1,000, or whatever.

In my ever-growing attempts to be helpful where writing new words are concerned, here is my round-up of new name ideas for these hybrid pooches, to add to the existing favorites like Cockapoos, Schnoodles, Labradoodles, Golden Poos, etc.

DISCLAIMER #1 I own two Cockapoos who are rescues from a wealthy family who decided they didn’t like them after all, once the pooches were 18 months old. DISCLAIMER #2 I am a total sucker for furry sob stories hence why I have 4 x dogs and 4 x cats, and counting.

Here are some to start with. Can you think of any more?

Aloodle: Poodle crossed with an Alsation (German Shepherd Dogs who, it’s said, were renamed in the UK during Word War 2 because folks in the UK and allied countries would be put off by the German name.)

Bearded Colloodle: dog that’s so hairy it can hardly see, but makes a comfortable, woolly throw to put on your couch.

Bichon Frisoodle: a ridiculously hairy little brat. Nice nature, if you can find the dog in all that fur.

Bloop: Bloodhound / Poodle cross that sheds spittle and spatters your walls to ceiling height with goop, then is able to use its own fur to wipe it all off again.

Border Colloodle: Cross with sly Collie that sneaked over the fence and did rude things with the Poodle brood bitch.

Chesapeakypoo: Poodle / Chesapeake Bay Retriever cross with fur so tightly packed it can swim all day and yet dry off without smelling, so appealing to the more sensitive inhabitants of chic gay Delaware beach resorts.

Chihuawoopie: ridiculously small dog. Whatever the cross.

Daschoodle: long, low, cross with curly fur so low to the ground you can use it to dust your floors.

GoldenNoodle: GoldenDoodle (Golden Retriever / Poodle cross) belonging to Italian family or restaurateurs and hence severely overweight by age 5

Great Danoodle: do you really want a dog that’s the size of a donkey with a fur that looks like it’s had a cheap perm?

Jack Roodle: a nasty little sh*t that looks like a cute teddy bear and savages the postman’s leg with a smile on its face.

Kelpoodle: Australian Poodle cross that, because its coat is so woolly, gets the sheep to co-operate as they think it’s one of their own.

LabraFoodle: LabraDoodle (Poodle / Labrador cross) which has inherited the classic Labrador obsession with food

Pitboopoo: Pitbull / Poodle cross. Comfort yourself with the thought that if you get savaged by one of these, at least you won’t get dog hairs all over your clothing.

Pomeroodle: the woollier coat muffles the tendency of Pomeranians and their larger cousins, the Spitz, to yap all day long at considerably higher decibel levels than the safe limit for humans.

Pugpoo: snub-nosed little dog with enough thick fur to wipe its own snot.

Rottwoop: guard dog with the right type of fur to keep you warm when it lies beside you and chews through your jugular vein.

Schitzpoo: nice cross, but tends to have colo-rectal issues.

Stroodle: Stray dog brought into rehoming center that then escapes to have sex with incoming poodles. In some Alpine countries, they have a capacity to dress up in lederhosen and slap their thighs in time to music when it is played.

Now, it’s your turn … I’m looking forward to reading your ideas!

photo credit: istolethetv via photopin cc